Life update

Monday, September 21, 2009

Life Update Current mood: anxious It's been awhile since my last blog. I've been scared to blog about what's going on, because I don't want to jinx anything. haha Well, yesterday I sat down and had a talk with Kaylie. For those who don't know she has always been a bed wetter. When we lived in Georgia it was never really bad. She would pee the bed about once every couple months or so. But when we moved to Virginia the episodes increased. Then it got better once we were settled down here. And now for the past three weeks it has spiked out of control. To almost an every night basis. The other night it happened twice in one night. So yesterday I went into her room and sat down with her. Asked her what is bothering her. Well, she is scared about having a new baby. She doesn't want to see me in pain. Which breaks my heart. She said "you'll get to the hospital in time to get medicine right?" awww. I told her I hope so. Thats the plan!! I so wish I had someone here so she didn't have to see me in labor. But since we have no choice, we'll just deal with it as it comes. She then preceded to tell me she doesn't want a brother or sister. She doesn't want me to have a baby. She thinks were not gonna love her anymore. She said "who's gonna get me something to eat if I can't get it?" Again, broke my heart! I said, Kaylie yes Brandon will take alot of moms time, but I will still have time for you. I will still make you your lunch, dinner, etc. That's not gonna change. It is gonna be a huge adjustment for all of us. So after our talk I think she felt better. I knew her being an only child so long would be a problem. I think once Brandon is here and she sees him and everything she'll feel okay. We'll see. Even the cat lately has been more attached to me. Like she knows. I literally almost step on her so many times because she's right on my heels! I'm doing okay. Just entirely uncomfortable. My feet are still swollen and blood pressure is borderline. My feet hurt so bad, it hurts to walk, it hurts to put them up for too long. It just all around is a pain in the rear. I can't even wear my rings anymore. I feel naked going out without them! My next OB appt is Oct 2nd. I'm still hoping to have him on the 6th in honor of my grandpa. That would be perfect. We'll see I guess. As long as I don't have a September baby I'm all good. ;) I start school Nov 2nd. I can't wait for that. I'm only starting out with two classes at a time. Hopefully I'll adjust fast and can take more than that somewhere down the line. I'm excited to work towards my degree. I'm going for my BA in Psychology and then move on to my Master's. I want to be a school counselor or work in a VA hospital. My ultimate goal is to get my PhD. Obama's school speech really motivated me and even brought me to tears. I have learned that your never too old to pursue your dreams and I'm not letting anything stop me form pursuing my goals anymore. :) Curt is doing good in school as well. I'm proud of him for having goalsl now as well. The Med board for him starts soon. Making me nervous. We've been talking about it. It's a very scary thing to think they might (and there is a good possibility) medically retire him. I've been researching all I can online about this. Of course I want him to be able to stay in. I think ultimately he wants that too. But he has to be able to meet the minimum requirements. Which he's not sure if he does or will. He has to be able to do a PT test. Well obviously he'll never run again. so thats out. And he can't walk the 2 miles either. The other two options are swimming it or riding a bike. And he's not sure he can ride the bike like that either. He also has to be able to carry a weapon, ammo, wear a helmet, and I think it is a vest. But we know for damn sure he can't carry a full combat load ever. It also talked about total joint replacements disqualify you from serving. So really we have no clue. I mean I know theres waivers for everything though. So we just have to kind of wait it out and not make assumptions and see what the board has to say. We have talked to his doctor about it some. It's just a scary thought. It's a given he can't be a scout anymore. His P3 profile is the stopping point there. He can't be a 19D with the profile he'll have. So he def has to re-class if he gets to stay in. If they do retire him I'm scared about where and what we are gonna do. He's not worried but I sure am. I mean I know we get a paycheck, heck we'll have not only his retirement check, his social security check (which we're still waiting on back pay for that), and he'll get BAH for the new GI bill. But I'm worried about where we should go. I know for sure I don't want to go back to Zion. I never want to live there again so Illinois is out. I would hate to go to Iowa to the rinky dink town my mom is in with two damn stoplights. haha I think I would like to go back to Columbus. I loved it there. But then I think how far away we are from family. And as nice as that is sometimes and other times it sucks big time! So I have no clue. It's just scary to think that in 6 months or so we could be out of the army and on our own.... Ugh!!! It's a very stressful situation with so much to think about and try to plan for. Especially something that might or might not happen. Damn Iraq. :( Trying to plan for the unknown is so not fun!