What is meant to be, will be

Finally got word that Curt can't reclass to career counselor. It is because he is non-deployable. Having an injured husband sucks sometimes...I know moreso for him, but still. He is super bummed about it I know. His injury has limited what he can do for the army and it kinda sucks. He can't even do his real job so he feels defeated right now. His SGM recommended to try for recruiting, but that is something he really doesn't want to do. So he called his branch manager and he is looking into what is available for Curt and will get back to him. Poor guy. He feel bad for him. He is due to reenlist too. I don't know. This situation sucks. Should we just finally take the medical retirement and move past the army or what? It's so tough!! And scary!!! Damn Iraq!!!!

In other news, I started my final class before my senior seminar on Monday. So excited!!! I will be done with school in just a few more short months!! I can't wait. :)

I'm also feeling more and more depressed about my weight. I weight 160 still. You know...I weighed 163 when I had Brandon. That makes me more depressed! Lying in bed last night feeling sorry for myself and I decided thats it, time to try it again! So I got up this morning and ran on the treadmill. My legs are already sore and so is my butt! I need to do this. It's the only way I will make a change. It's up to me and no one else. No more excuses!!! Part of my problem is I'm a night binge eater. I really don't eat all day. I will eat a piece of toast for breakfast and then by 10:30-11 I am starving so I will eat a sandwich, usually PB&J. Then I won't eat again, or I'll graze on Brandon's food he doesn't eat until dinnertime. By 4 I am sooo hungry I just want to eat everything. I'll cook dinner, eat. An hour or so later I'll eat again, then the rest of the night I just eat and stuff my face. This binge eating at night needs to stop. It's where my problem is.
Its going to be hard to make better choices, because..well...I love food, but it can't be my comfort anymore, it can't and doesn't help me out with anything. Time to change!!! I need to do this. I'm tired of hiding myself and the weight I have gained. Time to face it, deal with it, and do something about it. I don't want to fail. So I'm putting no time restraints on myself. One day at a time. One day at a time....